moving backwards and forwards
In addition to sharing adorable clothing and beautiful things, I also need this space to share my experiences with infertility. The first time around, I chronicled that emotional loop de loop on an anonymous blog. But, this is a story that I am no longer keeping secret.
I wanted so very much to somehow avoid being back in this place again, to get lucky again like we had the first time. But, I am not a terribly lucky person, so here I am.
For a while, despite my head being ready to try again for another child, my heart was not. Not ready to face another string of negatives. Not ready to deal with trying so very hard to keep my my hopes tethered, only to have them rise just in time for the inevitable crash.
But, we really want another baby. Want him or her enough to go through whatever it is that awaits us this time around.
We gave it a while on our own. But, tomorrow I will once again be walking into a doctor’s office.
It feels like we are moving both backwards and forwards all at the same time.
I am hoping a new doctor will have new insights, new solutions, new hope.
And, so it begins. again.
our lovely days 
I’m gad you are here (not anonymously!) sharing your experience…..I think you are going to find a lot of support. Just a hunch. I’ll be sending you lots of fertile thoughts….. xoxo
What a beautiful blog you have. I hope you keep posting. Good luck with your journey. Things have a way of happening not how you plan them. This may not help AT ALL …BUT i’m sending good vibes for you and the good luck vibes from my friend’s 2nd IVF treatment has just worked and my best friend has just given birth to a beautiful miracle baby girl after years of secondary infertility followed by 3 miscarriages. Sometimes the journey is tough but the rainbow at the end is worth waiting for. xx Sorry if it really didn’t help. I believe it will some day…